would rather

Be doing anything other then trying to come up with answers for the comps.  I am practicing.
I would rather be napping, cooking, even cleaning.
I went to an Indian festival and got Henna on my hands.
I just found out through e-mail that I am meeting with my chair tomorrow.
Next week is my break from work.  I expect more work to be done that week.
Weekends just go by too quickly.
It is hard to stay focused.
Glad to hear that my friend is now on a better path.  A good chair someone who believes in you will make a HUGE difference.
Its funny because the one friend I told in my program is mad that they failed me and is a little bitter about the extra work I now have to do.  He said, its their fault, if they didn't fail you you wouldn't have this extra stress.  It is a stigma though, no one talks about failing comps.
I keep telling myself in one year this will all be over.
But now I must finish this practice......

Meeting with chair

Destiny is Not a Matter of Chance, it is a Matter of Choice; it is Not a Thing to be Waited for, it is a Thing to be Achieved. 
~William Jennings Bryan


My title sounds like I am talking to furniture.  Nope I am not my friends, I am talking to THE CHAIR, the all important one.  The person who will make sure I finish this PhD.  
So we have set a new date for Comps, May 6-9th.  
We talked at length about the new questions and I am going to start answering them to an extent and have my chair give me feedback.  I must pass them this time.  I have also given myself more time to perfect it and worry more....lol maybe not the worrying.  
I have often told students that they need to set aside a time and just worry in that time but that they are not allowed to worry any other time during the day except during that time.  Usually they can't so then they stop worrying.  
It is in the school's best interest that I pass my comps this time.  I will I promise.  
Then the next step is oral comps which I will rock at.  
Then I have to propose my prospectus.  
Once I do that I don't have to supervise any more Masters students.  It will give me more time to just write.  Plus my husband will be back finishing his BA.  So plenty of time to write.  
But first things first....Comps.  
I think I will act like its my first time taking comps.  That might make it better. That way I don't fear failing again.  And I won't think of the consequences of failing.
In a way I think that the questions are easier.....did they dumb it down?  Do I care if they did?  Not really, nope not at all.  
The sun is shining and I feel more energetic but its still not saying much since well I usually would be asleep right now.  I am on the mend though.